Situations
by SkellingtonZero
Summary: We all have embarrassing stories. We've all been stuck in awkward situations. We've all been sitting there thinking 'what the hell do I do now' -L awkward, funny, a bit cute, fluffy, stupid,
1. Ino & Shikamaru

Greetings, I am L.

I hope you enjoy this and I hope you will leave a review if you want me to continue.

Situations

Chapter 1

Embarrassing moments.

We all suffer them.

We all have those moments where we wish we could just melt into the ground and die.

My name is Ino Yamanaka.

And everyone knew when I got my period.

_Situations Situations _

I heaved a heavy sigh as I leaned into my mirror over my bathroom sink and dabbled a bit of pink lipstick onto my lips. It was my first day back from my month long vacation and I wanted to look my best.

I leaned back and admired my reflection.

I had long, blonde hair tied up in a high pony tail that I curled so it cascaded beautifully down my back.

My gorgeous, blue, iridescent eyes were lined with black eyeliner, painted with purple eye shadow, and encased in long, false lashes.

I wore a revealing purple halter top that stopped at my hips, with white short shorts and purple pumps.

I never looked better; without a backward glance I left my bathroom, flicked off the light, and grabbed my purple clutch then left my apartment. I lived at the top of one of the most expensive apartment buildings in the city; which meant it took me awhile to get down to the ground. I locked my front door, made my way down the hall to the elevator and clicked the lobby button. It took me about ten minutes to actually reach the lobby what with all the stops it had to make on the different floors. Around the seventh floor I fished my shades out of my purse.

I was meeting up my boyfriend, Shikamaru Nara and some of my other friends. See, I work as a model, a tough but very rewarding job. My boyfriend however works on the city council, lazy as he is. So it's difficult getting to see him; but we make do.

It was midmorning when I finally left the apartment building.

The sun was shining and extremely hot, it was summer after all. But the wind was nice and cool, the perfect weather for going to the seaport.

We had plans to go to the seaport, a beautiful place that was once an actual working seaport. They had ships of all kinds, old and new plus a ship themed restaurant as well as a simple diner like place. It was something I was looking forward to ever since he suggested it.

Plus, our friends were coming along as well.

I hurried across the crosswalk and slipped my diamond encrusted sunglasses on then began to walk do to the small café we all decided to meet at. It wasn't a long walk, maybe ten minutes tops.

When I arrived, my best friend Sakura was already seated outside on the patio waiting patiently for the others. She was a pretty girl I admit, not as hot as me but still pretty good looking. She wore a simple white men's tee-shirt she had cut into a v-neck with black short shorts and ankle-high Converse. Her long, pink hair was tied up into a messy bun at the crown of her head and she wore her ever present aviator shades on the bridge of her nose. She was a doctor, and a good one at that; she worked at Lady Tsunade's hospital and specialized in poisons.

"Hey Sakura." I waved and walked up to her, placing my clutch purse on the table. "How are you?" I asked and leaned down to hug her.

"Morning Ino." She smiled and hugged me back. "I'm fine. How was your trip?" She motioned for me to sit down opposite her then nudged her glass of water towards me.

"Oh it was great!" I grinned and sipped the water. "So you know how I went on this cruise right? Oh you've got to go yourself! Its marvelous! There weren't any annoying kids and everyone was so nice! It stopped at every port and I went shopping-by the way remind me to give you your gifts! I brought some things for you! Anyways it was relaxing, every day was simply luxurious and the food was simply fantastic!"

I laughed and sat back.

"Sounds like you had a good time." Sakura grinned at me and leaned back.

"Yeah." I nodded and tossed my long, curled hair over my shoulder. "So how long have you been waiting?"

She shrugged and touched the screen of her phone to read the time. "About…three minutes maybe? Naruto said he'd be here really soon, so did Hinata and Kiba."

I twisted my lips and nodded. "That's Naruto's shirt isn't it?"

"Yup. Took it from him…on Monday? Or was it Saturday?"

Naruto was Sakura's boyfriend; an annoying, hyper, airheaded blonde who I have no idea why she bothers dating when she could defiantly get someone better.

Hinata was a sweet, quite girl and Kiba was one of Naruto's best friend. Just as loud and obnoxious as he was.

"Sasuke's not coming?" I chewed the corner of my lip and stared at her nails she painted black.

"Nope. He had to work today. Morning Shikamaru."

I looked up just as he crashed his lips to mine. I giggled as he pressed his tongue between my lips and his large, warm hands rubbed the side of my neck.

"Awww cuteeee…" I heard Sakura coo.

"Oh it's cute when they do it but you slap me the second my hand touches your leg?" Naruto's amused, slightly offended voice reached my ears.

I pulled back away from Shikamaru to see him gazing down at me, his dark, intelligent eyes inches from my own. "Hi." I mumbled reaching my index finger up to trace along his temple, down his cheek and over his lips. "I missed you…"

"Missed you too." He stated huskily as I stuck my finger into his mouth and he licked it.

"Now that's fucking-"

"Naruto!" Sakura cried then slapped his arm. "Shut up!"

"Why?" He whined, and I watched out of the corner of my eye as he wrapped one arm over her shoulders and pulled her closer to him.

"'Cause they haven't seen each other in a month!"

"So?" He inclined his head down to hers. "I haven't seen you in three days cause you were working…"

"And the gangs all here." I looked over Shikamaru's shoulder to see Kiba standing there with Hinata at his side. He wore a gray shirt and black cargo shorts while Hinata wore a lavender summer dress with her long, violet hair tied in a loose pony tail at the nape of her neck.

"Yeah we all are." I raised an eyebrow and leaned into Shikamaru who stood up so I was now snuggling into his toned stomach. "We going now?"

"Sure." Sakura stood up with Naruto clinging to her hips.

Literally.

Both his arms were wrapped around her hips as he stood up behind her.

I snorted and stood up while my boyfriend took my hand.

"Whose car are we going with?" I asked as Shikamaru led me out of the café patio and onto the sidewalk with Sakura and Naruto behind me.

"Mine." Kiba answered and began leading the way. "I brought my Hummer." He led us down the sidewalk and into a parking lot. It was a bit crowded but nothing compared to the weekend rush.

"The H3x?" Naruto asked as we approached Kiba's jet black Hummer parked towards the far corner of the lot.

"Yeah."

"It's a five seater…" He trailed off suggestively.

"I'll sit in Shikamaru's lap." I jumped in, saving Sakura as Kiba unlocked the doors.

"No, it's cool. Sakura can sit in my lap." He insisted, pushing past me to open the back door.

"I think its best if-"

"Would you all just shut up?" Kiba sighed and opened the driver's door. "Ino sit in Shikamaru's lap." He ordered and sat in the driver's seat while Hinata climbed into the passenger side.

"Aww…" Naruto pouted, helping Sakura into the back seat.

_Situations Situations _

It took about two hours to reach the seaport.

Two long, leg cramping, back aching hours filled with complaints, arguments and insults. All of which were forgotten as soon as Kiba pulled into the parking lot.

Within seconds we were all out of the Hummer stretching, grunting, laughing and making plans.

"Oh we need to visit the gift shop." Sakura pointed out, arching her back while Naruto stood behind her, ready to catch her if she fell. "I want a little scale model of a ship…and a map!"

"I want a Captin's hat." Kiba grinned shutting the trunk and walking over to the group. "We ready to go?" He asked, glancing around.

"Yeah." Shikamaru answered, taking my hand in his.

Kiba nodded, locked the doors then shoved the keys into his pocket. "Alright! Let's go!" He yelled and wrapped one arm around Naruto's neck and proceeded to drag him up to the ticket booth. Sakura laughed and fell in step with Hinata who was walking in front of us. "Energetic aren't they?" She asked, lopping one arm through Hinata's.

"Yeah, its nice though." She answered calmly.

"Hurry up you guys!" Naruto yelled back at them as a young man attached the pass to his wrist.

"We're coming!" Sakura yelled back, quickening their pace. "No one told you to run ahead and buy the tickets." She muttered as they approached the ticket booth.

"Hold out your wrist Miss." The young man blushed as he looked down at Sakura who held out her left wrist for him to attach the wristlet.

"Yeah well…" And then Naruto trailed off.

"We bought you guys own too." Kiba interjected, waving us over to another young man attaching the wristlets. "So you better buy lunch."

Shikamaru sighed but nodded anyway as we followed Naruto and Sakura out into the seaport.

It was beautiful.

Never mind the faint scent of horse poo.

Or the loud clanging of bells.

Or the obnoxious cries of children.

It was beautiful.

It was like being back in the ninetieth century.

There were ships, little houses, horses and people dressed in the century wear. I gasped. There was a boat you can actually ride on!

"Well someone's excited." Sakura's amused voice brought me back down to earth. She stood off to the side, her arm looped in Naruto's. "Let's go this way." She nodded down the trail nearest her that was closest to the water. "We can go aboard the ships."

And that we did.

We spent about an hour and a half just touring the ships, asking questions, pretending to sail them, hopping from one ship to another.

Naruto and Sakura ended up spending about ten minutes exploring a shipwreck; climbing all over the thing, finding every possible hiding place, and treating the preserved ship like their own, personal playground.

After that we moved onto the village surrounding the seaport.

There we explored each and every building, down to the convenience store and local church.

Spending a total of about three hours.

"Hey, how about lunch?" Naruto asked, standing in the shade of a large tree with Sakura. "I'm hungry." He frowned, rubbing his stomach.

"I agree." Shikamaru spoke up, kissing my temple. "What do you say Ino? After lunch we can ride the horse drawn carriage."

I nodded smiling.

So we went to the restaurant, Kiba leading the way.

"Don't forget your paying Shikamaru." He warned, holding open the door for us to enter.

"Yeah yeah." He sighed and greeted the waiter. "Table for six please."

"Right this way sir." The waiter led the way down to the back of the empty restaurant, seating us near the open doors.

"Empty today huh?" Shikamaru asked, holding out my chair and striking up a conversation with the waiter.

"Ah yes. We don't have many guests for lunch but we're always busy for dinner."

"I'll bet."

"Can I get you all some drinks?"

"Water for now." Kiba spoke up, sitting on the other side of Shikamaru." The waiter nodded and placed the menus on the table. "Alright, I'll be right back."

I sighed and settled down into my seat, Sakura sitting beside me. "This is nice." She commented, looking around at the décor. "Mhm." I nodded, flipping though the menu and playing with my boyfriends fingers.

I was hungry.

But I also needed to use the restroom.

But I really wanted to order first.

Damn.

What to do?

I sighed and crossed my legs.

Alright, restroom comes first.

After a few seconds I cleared my throat. "Okay, I think I need to use the ladies room. How about you two?" I asked, standing up.

"I do." Sakura sighed, removing Naruto's hand from her lap.

"Ino…honey…?" Shikamaru looked up at me, a slight tinge on his handsomely tanned face.

"What is it?" I asked slowly.

"Babe…I…I think you've started your period…" He trailed off, his face completely red.

I gasped.

My heart started pounding.

The blood roared in my ears.

No.

No no no no no!

It couldn't be!

I bit my lip and turned to Sakura, silently begging her to tell me he was lying.

She frowned and leaned back to stare at my butt.

"I-Ino…I'm so sorry…" She whispered, her emerald eyes shining in pity.

"NO!" I whispered, my face hot.

She jumped up and turned me around and pushed me in the direction of the restroom, my brain completely shutting off.

"Here Ino." She directed me through the doors and into the restroom, Hinata at her heels. "Lock the door Hinata." I heard her order and she pushed me towards the sink. "Okay…alright…" I watched the reflection as she inspected the damage.

Beside me Hinata walked up and patted my shoulder. "Ino…do you have any tampons or something in your purse?" She asked gently, her eyes wide and filled with sympathy.

I bit my lip and shook my head. "No! I wasn't expecting till next week!"

"So you have nothing?" Sakura repeated dubiously.

"NO! Oh God how bad is it?" I shrieked my red completely red with embarrassment.

I couldn't believe this happened to me.

It was so fucking embarrassing!

And in front of the guys too!

I whimpered and buried my face in my hands.

Sakura sighed and patted my shoulder. "Well you're wearing white so it shows…" She mumbled softly.

I sniveled.

This was one of the worst possible things that could have happened today.

And everything was going perfectly too!

"But don't worry."

"Don't worry?" I whirled on her, my eyes wild with panic. "How can I not?"

She rolled her eyes and scratched the back of her head. "Hinata has a tampon you can have." She stated simply looking behind me.

I looked at her and blinked.

Then turned around to see Hinata standing there, a light blush on her cheeks holding out a tampon. "Here Ino." She mumbled, staring down at her feet.

"T-thanks Hinata…" I mumbled back and accepted the tampon, noting her open purse dangling in her hand.

"Now you stay here with Hinata and I'll go buy you something to wear." She chewed her inner cheek and moved towards the door.

"What? NO-I-"

"Don't worry Ino, Hinata's here with you." And with that, she left.

I groaned and turned back to see Hinata standing off to the side, her face completely red. "Uh…Ino…maybe you should go put in the tampon…" She mumbled awkwardly.

"…Yeah…" I kept my gaze to the ground as I walked to the stall, tampon in hand.

_Situations Situations _

About twenty minutes later a knock was heard at the bathroom door followed by Sakura's voice. "It's me, open up."

I rushed to the door and yanked it open to see Sakura standing there holding a dark blue bag out to me. "It's not designer label." She stated, walking in and shutting the door behind her. "But it'll do."

I opened the bag to see black sweats staring up at me.

"It'll hide whatever stains you have." Sakura stared bluntly, strolling over to the sink and turning on the pipe. "It's a size small." She looked at my through the mirror as she washed her hands. "I told the guys that we need to leave as soon as you come out. They said alright. Kiba and Naruto are pulling the car around and Shikamaru is waiting for you outside."

I blushed and nodded then scurried into the stall to change.

My white shorts were completely ruined.

And I mean completely.

I shut my eyes and ripped them off and quickly pulled on the black sweats.

They were a lot more comfortable.

I chewed my lip as I tossed my stained shorts into the bag and walked out; Sakura and Hinata stood waiting. "It looks good Ino." Hinata offered smiling.

I nodded. "Thanks." I walked over to the sink and washed my hands.

"Do you want the shorts or should I toss them for you Ino?" Sakura asked, a smile dancing on her lips. I turned to face her, my hands wet with water. "…Toss em." I closed my eyes. "This is so embarrassing…"

"Yeah well…lucky we were here right?" She asked, raising an eyebrow as she chucked the bag into the trash and opened the door. Hinata walked through first and I followed her. "Yeah." I stopped as soon as we were in the hallway and turned to face her. "Thanks Sakura. Really thank you." I chewed my lower lip and fiddled with the drawstring of the pants. "I don't know what I would have done if you weren't there…"

She shrugged, her cheeks turning pink. "Yeah well…what are friends for?"

I let out a pathetic laugh and hugged her. "Yeah…what are friends for?"

"Ino? You okay?" I let go of Sakura and turned around to see Shikamaru standing there at the end of the hallway with Hinata at his side. He looked awkward, one hand shoved into his pant pocket, the other just dangling there. His face was contorted into worry and bashfulness and his eyes kept darting to me and back to the ground.

I couldn't answer him.

I was completely humiliated.

I didn't know what to say.

What do you say to your boyfriend in a situation like that?

Then I felt Sakura grab my hand and give it a squeeze. "She's fine Shikamaru." She pulled me down the hallway to him. "Just completely humiliated. Go easy on her okay?" And then she dropped my hand, grabbed Hinata's elbow and left Shikamaru and me completely alone.

We stood there for a few seconds.

Not saying anything.

Just standing there, awkwardly, in the middle of the hallway.

Then he reached up and cupped his hand around the side oh my neck, his thumb stroking the side of my cheek. "So you're okay?" He asked.

I nodded.

"Good…I was worried…"

I stared down at his shoes.

This was awkward.

Completely and totally awkward.

"Ino look at me."

I shook my head no.

This was too much.

He was my boyfriend!

He was Mr. Perfect.

He worked on the city council.

He was a complete and totally genius.

And this was the most humiliating thing that could have happened to me in front of him.

Why him? Of all people why him?

He sighed and wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest. "Ino its okay. These things happen." He whispered, rubbing my back. "If you want I can carry a tampon or whatever the hell it is you use in my wallet for you." He mumbled into my ear.

I cracked a smile.

"Really, I mean it…"

I giggled.

He always knew how to make me feel better.

No matter what.

"Really? You would?" I looked up into his eyes and he nodded. "Yeah…but now I think I'd better get you home."

I nodded.

He was the best.

He was completely understanding.

I was stupid.

I got myself worked up over an accident.

I laced my fingers through his as he guided me through the restaurant.

Of course he would understand, he was the best boyfriend ever.

I smiled as I stared at our hands interwoven.

And I was stupid to think otherwise.

_Situations Situations _

The ride back wasn't as awkward as I thought it'd be.

Sakura sat on Naruto's lap, Kiba drove, Hinata sat shotgun, and no one mentioned what happened.

Well, at least not for the first twenty minutes they didn't.

It was at a red light the questions started.

And wouldn't you know it; Kiba was the one that started it all.

"Hey Ino…what the hell was that back there?" He asked, looking at me though the rearview mirror. "Sakura wouldn't tell me anything…you're not dying are you?" He looked a bit worried as he eased the gas.

I blushed and looked at Sakura who shrugged and tucked her head beneath Naruto's chin.

"You mean you don't know what a period is Kiba?" The blonde asked bluntly.

I chuckled.

I wasn't to hear the answer to that too.

Kiba glanced back at us though the mirror and merged into the right lane. "No I know what it is but…don't they…I mean…why…I…?" He stuttered, completely confused. "Look I don't know what the hell happened back there." He finally spat, slightly annoyed and discomfited.

To my amazement Naruto reached forward and thumped him on the head and answered for me. "She had an accident Kiba. It happens. She wasn't expecting her period to come this week so she wasn't prepared." He stated simply and wrapped his arm around Sakura's body.

"Oh…" Kiba nodded in understanding. "Wow…sorry Ino…" He muttered. "Being a girl must really be a pain in the ass…"

I pursed my lips and ignored him.

But silently I agreed.

Being a girl was a pain in the ass.

_Situations Situations _

L.

What do you think?

Review with your thoughts.

Should I continue?

Continue?

All constructive and unconstructive criticism is welcome.


	2. Naruto & Sakura

L.

This story is a bit short, though I find it highly amusing.

Situations

Chapter 2

It's one thing when your girlfriend asks you to do something embarrassing.

It's another when it's your best friend.

And it's something else entirely when your girlfriend is also your best friend.

My name is Naruto Uzumaki.

And my girlfriend sent me on the most humiliating, confusing errand.

_Situations Situations _

I awoke to the wonderful smell of coffee wafting into my room and up my nose. I sighed contently and stretched out on my king sized bed and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. It was a Wednesday morning, the one morning that was the best out of the entire week because Sakura always slept over and Wednesdays were our day off from work.

After a few minutes of lying there, I heard footsteps right outside the door then she came in. I grinned as I looked at her. She was wearing one of my white shirts with nothing on underneath it and black boy shorts.

"Morning babe." I mumbled as she handed me my mug of coffee and sat by my side sipping her own.

"Good morning." She cooed and snuggled down into the warmth. "Slept good?"

"Mhm." I took a sip of the coffee and sighed, she always made the best cups. "How long have you been up?" I asked, rubbing one hand along her spine, smiling as she tucks one strand of hair out of her face.

"Oh not long…maybe half an hour?"

I nodded and took another sip.

"Well I should get ready." She sighed and stood up after a few seconds.

"What? Why?" I was enjoying it, the moment we were sharing.

Sakura looked down at me, placed her mug on the bedside table, and leaned down to kiss me good morning. I grinned as she ran her tongue over my bottom lip and stuck her tongue into my mouth the second I grant her entrance. She giggled as I wrapped one arm around her ass and pulled her into my lap when she began to nibble on my lips.

After a few seconds she pulled away and started twirling strands of my messy hair. "Mmm you promised to take me to breakfast." She pouted cutely and squirmed in my lap.

I leaned back against the pillows and raised an eyebrow at her. "I did?"

"Yup." She leaned down over me. "Last night."

I smirked. "I promised to take you to breakfast last night?"

She nodded, the tip of her nose brushing mine.

"Funny." I placed my mug beside hers on the bedside table. "I don't remember ever saying that."

"Really?"

"I do however remember saying I wanted to have you for breakfast." With that said, I grabbed her hips and flipped her so that I was now looming above her.

"No! Naruto!" She laughed and placed her hands on either side of my face. "I don't wanna, I want food."

I raised an eyebrow at her and grinned. "Wel-"

"Not that food!" She blushed and pushed me off her then made her way into the bathroom. "Come on take me to breakfast!"

Why not?

It's been ages since we last went out for breakfast.

"Sure." I sat up and stretched my back.

"Really?"

"Yeah. Hurry up I have to shower too…" I trailed off suggestively and stood up.

"Not with me you aren't." She answered then shut the door.

I shrugged and made my way over to my dresser for some new boxers.

_Situations Situations _

It was a cool summers mid-morning, the sun was out, the wind was blowing, the sky was clear. It was perfect. In just a few minutes, I was going to take Sakura to breakfast. That is, if I can find my belt.

I frowned as I got down on all four and began to search under the bed.

Until Sakura started screaming her lungs out in the bathroom.

"Sakura?" I yelled, jumped off the bed and ran to the bathroom. "Babe answer me!" I knocked on the door and listened.

"Shit!" She cursed.

I listened intently and heard her rummage through the bathroom closet, groaning as things fell to the floor. "Sakura?" I tried again.

"Not now Naruto!"

I sighed and knocked again.

"I said not now!"

"Well too bad babe, now tell me what's wrong." I placed both my hands on either side of the door and waited for her to open it.

Which she did about three seconds later.

"Naru-what?" She took a step back when she saw me looming over her.

"This became my concern the second you screamed your ass off in here." I stated, looking over her shoulder into the bathroom to see half the contents from the closet scattered on the ground. "So what's wrong."

She glared at me from under her long lashes for a few seconds before finally giving up and pouting.

Which is never a good sign.

"Naru-baby?" She cooed, batting her lashes.

I sighed.

This wasn't going to go anywhere pleasant.

"What?"

She clasped her hands and opened her eyes even larger. "Baby I need you to run down to the store and buy me some tampons."

I blinked.

And blinked.

Then blinked some more.

She couldn't be serious.

I thought she broke the toilet or something-but a tampon? Really?

She wants me to go and buy her tampons?

"So will you?"

I sighed and removed myself from the doorway and began to walk back into the bedroom. "Will I what?"

"Go buy me some tampons! Playtex please." She trotted up behind me and grabbed my arm. "Please? Baby I really need."

"...What is a tampon anyway?" I asked seriously.

She blinked and stared up at me. "Really?"

I frowned. "Yes really. I'm not a girl-I don't have any reason to know what it is."

"Oh…" She blushed, ran back into the bathroom and after some yelps, curses, and what I presume to be a shampoo bottle cracking, she reappeared at my side holding something.

"And this is…?" I stared down at the little green, cylinder like thing she held out to me.

"It's a tampon."

I stared at it.

"Its in its packaging." She sighed and opened it to reveal a long green tube.

I blinked.

"…You don't seriously…"

She nodded.

"You really put that up…"

Nod.

"And it doesn't…."

Nod.

"How does it stay…"

She slapped my arm. "Enough questions baby, please?"

I glanced down at her to see her shinning emerald eyes staring up at me. "Oh alright." I mumbled and grabbed my wallet off the dresser. "But I better get rewarded when I get back." I bent down and kissed her lips before I left.

"OH! And pink nail polish too!"

_Situations Situations _

I groaned and covered my face with my rough hands and heaved a heavy sigh. I was doing this for Sakura; she needed them, that's why she asked.

I took a deep, bracing breath then walked into the pharmacy.

I was doing it for my girlfriend.

I was doing it because I've known her for years.

I was doing it because she's got me whipped.

I, Naruto Uzumaki was sent out to the pharmacy by my hormone crazed girlfriend to buy tampons.

So I walked through the double doors and into the store; then stopped. I had no idea where they kept the tampons.

I must have looked completely and totally lost because at that exact moment a worker came up to me. "Sir?" I looked down to see a young woman smiling at me. "May I help you?"

It took a few seconds before I realized that she could help.

"Uh yeah actually you can." I chuckled nervously and stuck one hand in my pocket. "I'm uh…looking for ah…tampons?"

She looked confused for a moment before smiling, then nodding, then grabbing my wrist and pulling me down the lanes until we reached the correct isle.

"This is it Sir." She smiled again then left.

"Thanks Miss." I called after her then turned to face the shelves.

And then I just stood there.

There were so many; it was rows upon rows of boxes, names, prices; it was overwhelming.

I bit my lower lip and studied the many multicolored shelves in front of me. Tampax, Kotex, Always, Playtex…what the hell? Why are there so many brands? I squinted my eyes as I re-read some of the labels. Pads? What are they? Aren't they all the same?

This is going to take awhile.

I sighed, closed my eyes and crossed my arms then took a deep breath.

Now what was it she said she needed?

Tampons right?

Okay so…just go with whatever says tampons!

I opened my eyes and scanned the shelves again. Shit. Half of them say tampon…

Now I was beginning to sweat a little.

Why were there so many different ones?

Don't they all do the same job?

And what is 'leak protection?'

Hn…okay okay…so they all say tampon…now….how else can I narrow it down?

I sniffed and began to read the boxes again. 'Overnight, leak guard, sports…' Shit…I'm already lost…

Aww Sakura….why'd you make me do this?

I screwed my eyes shut and began to pace the isle. What was I going to do? I couldn't go home empty handed and I didn't know what the hell she really wanted! Why didn't she just write it down…?

I glanced back at the shelves mocking me and cringed.

There were different sizes too! Light, regular, heavy? What?

Odor eliminator?

What the hell is this crap?

Sakura doesn't need all that…does she?

"Hey Naruto." I looked over my shoulder to see Shikamaru standing there smirking. "Sakura sent you out for tampons huh?" He asked, glancing at the shelves then back at my nervous face.

I nodded. "Yeah…hey why the hell are there so many to choose from? Girls don't need all that crap…do they?" I begged.

He shrugged casually, one hand in his pocket. "It's just like any other market-competition. The better the product the more consumers would buy it."

I stared at him.

"Anyway." He cleared his throat. "You should hurry up you know."

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair.

"I know but…I don't know what to buy…"

He shifted slightly and crossed his arms. "Didn't she tell you the brand?"

I thought for a moment then nodded. "…Well…she said…Playtex I think…"

He pointed to the far right. "Playtex is right there. The pink boxes."

"Oh!" I walked over to where he pointed then scowled. "There's a shitload of these too!"

"Of course there is Naruto." He sighed. "There are different sizes and types."

"Which one do I buy?"

He looked at me oddly then snorted. "How the hell am I supposed to know Naruto? I'm not dating Sakurai."

I frowned and stared at the pink boxes in front of me. "Yeah…yeah…okay…so why are you here?"

He held up the loaf of bread and I glanced at it out of the corner of my eye. "I'm out of bread." He stated simply and checked his watch. "And I have to go now. C'ya and good luck."

"W-alright…thanks…" I half-heartily thanked him as I picked up one box and began to read it then put it back after a few seconds.

I stared at the different sizes and packages all lined up in a row and frowned. Light, thin, regular, super, overnight…so many!

And then, a fairly large box caught my eye.

Light, regular and super? I grabbed it and scanned the box. Playtex.

Well, it has a bit of each doesn't it?

So it should do just fine.

I smirked to myself and walked up the isle to the cashier. "Hello." I grinned at the man cashing and pulled out my wallet.

"Good day Sir." He greeted stiffly and took the box of tampon then scanned it. "That'll be eighteen-fifty." He took the twenty I held out and opened the register. "Did you find everything okay?"

I snorted sourly and took back my change. "Hell no." I muttered and watched as he placed the box in a plastic bag and held it out.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, finding the right tampon was a pain in the ass." I muttered and grabbed the bag then left.

_Situations Situations _

"Sakura? Sakura babe?" I asked as I walked through the front door, kicking it shut then proceeded through the living room.

"I'm in the bedroom." She answered back.

I kicked off my shoes and walked through the corridor, past the bathroom, and into the bedroom to see her sitting on the bed, flipping through a magazine. "Hey Babe got your tampons." I tossed the bag onto the bed and leaned down for her to kiss me.

"Thanks." She dodged my kiss and opened the bag then clicked her tongue disapprovingly.

"What?" My skin began to prickle with fear. "Why'd you make that sound?"

She sighed, flipped her long pink hair over her shoulder and scowled. "You forgot my nail polish."

I bit my lip.

Nail polish?

Did she really also ask for nail polish?

I groaned and turned around.

"I'll be back in a bit…what color did you want again?" I asked heavily, inwardly crying because I still haven't had breakfast yet.

"Mmmm pink." She cooed into my ear. I turned around to find her standing on the tips of her toes, smiling at me. "Thanks baby." She ran her long fingers though my hair and leaned into me. "I appreciate it."

I grinned and picked her up, her legs automatically wrapping around my waist. "I hope so." I mumbled against her lips. "I spent like a whole fucking hour standing there trying to figure that crap out."

"Yeah…" She sighed into the kiss.

I pulled away from her touch as I placed her on the bed and stared seriously into her confused emerald orbs. "Please don't ever ask me to do that again."

"What?"

"Please don't ever ask me to go buy you tampons again."

_Situations Situations _

L.

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	3. Gaara & Sakura

L.

Situations

Chapter 3

If you're a guy, you know its pain in the ass to get a boner.

You also know it's even worse when you get them in public.

And what even worse than that,

Is if you get it if front of people you work with.

My name is Gaara.

And I got turned on by my best friend's girl.

_Situations Situations _

My name is Gaara and my day started out bad and steadily went downhill from there. First, I woke up late because my stupid alarm clock decided to be an asshole and break on one of the most important day of my life. Well according to my annoying older sister it was. Then, my older brother decided to be a complete dick and drank out all of my favorite coffee and left me none. And to top it off, I couldn't even have my morning 'me time' in the shower.

Suffice to say, I knew right away my day was not going to get any better.

So I left the house with Temari yelling in one ear and Kankurou cackling in the other.

Like it was my fucking fault the damned alarm clock broke.

Okay so maybe it was, but she was the one that put it on my goddamn bed.

"Temari." I glared at her before unlocking the doors to my black Lexus and sliding into the driver's seat.

"What Gaara?" She scowled and tossed her excessively large purse onto the passenger seat successfully hitting my arm in the process.

I swear if this woman keeps this up the entire day I will kill her.

"Shut up."

This earned me a glare and more huffing. "Have some semblance of respect for your older sister Gaara." She chastised and buckled her seatbelt. "Now let's go. We're going to be late enough as it is."

"Yeah let's get a move on little brother." Kankurou chimed in from the back.

"Damn you two to hell."

_Situations Situations _

We made it to work half an hour late, which in my opinion wasn't bad. But of course, it was a problem for Temari who shoved me into the meeting room without warning when I made a bee line for the kitchen. Curse that woman; why the hell did she have to go out of her way to make my life a living hell? What difference would it make if I was a further five minutes late?

None.

Because half the staff wasn't even ready by the time we arrived.

The meeting had something to do with working with some hospital to mass produce some of their equipment or something.

To be honest I really didn't care.

I still didn't get my cup of coffee.

I sighed as everyone around me babbled on and on about one thing or another, effectively pissing me off more and more.

"You okay there Gaara?" I looked down at the woman at my side that held a steaming cup of coffee out to me.

"I've been better thanks." I gratefully accepted the cup and took a sip.

Delicious.

"So what are you doing here Sakura?" I asked, eyeing her from the corner of my eye. She wore a skin tight black skirt that went down to her knees and a white blouse that she left unbuttoned to reveal the tops of her breasts. Around her waist was a large black belt embroidered with lace and on her feet were black pumps with red lining along the soles.

In short she looked sexy.

"I'm representing the hospital." She smiled and tucked a stand of her pink hair behind her ear. "You know my boss-she's too lazy to see to these things so she delightfully sends me in her place." A smile lit up her face as she innocently touched my forearm and laughed. "Anyways you seem awfully happy to be here."

"You know it." I muttered, tearing my gaze away from her, trying to burn the image of her attractive face from my mind.

Which was difficult.

The way her long pink hair was slowly slipping from the pins holding it to the top of her head was absurdly erotic.

Inwardly I cursed and chugged down the remainder of my coffee before taking my seat at head of the table, effectively starting the meeting.

_Situations Situations _

It went on for over two hours, people talking, and talking and talking.

It was mind numbingly boring.

And I just couldn't concentrate.

Between my lack of private time in the shower and the fact that Sakura was sitting across from me was reason enough for me to be distracted.

This was a bad time for my mind to start wandering.

For one, I was in the middle of a very important meeting that could determine the future of our company.

For another, I was in the presence of well, every one of my goddamn important employees.

And lastly, there was the most beautiful, sexy woman sitting directly across from me.

So what does a wandering, bored, horny mind lead to?

Obviously sex.

And masturbation.

Inwardly I cringed as my mind started playing the most recent porn movies I watched. It was one with a hot blonde giving some guy a blow job.

Fuck.

I could feel the beginnings of a boner started.

Shit.

I shifted uncomfortably in my chair, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. Which was pretty damn hard to do considering the fact that I was the president and the entire table was now looking at me in expectation.

What the hell did they all want?

Shit.

They all couldn't possibly know I'm half hard.

Could they?

No.

That's not fucking possible.

Is it?

I glanced around the table, my face a solid mask.

"What?" I muttered to Kankurou who leaned in casually to my side.

"Are we good to move on to the next faze?" He whispered.

"Next faze?" My eyes flickered to the module sitting in the middle of the table.

"Of the presentation."

I sent him a blank look.

"The explanation…to further explain…" He trailed off, frowning at me.

"Yeah sure whatever." I sighed and squeezed the bridge of my nose, warding off the headache.

At least I no longer had a boner.

Though I was confused as hell as to what was actually going on in the meeting.

I sighed and leaned back in my chair to watch what was going on.

"Here." Suddenly a large packet was shoved into my face. I glared at it. "Take it Gaara." I glanced up at the woman who was shoving the thing in my face to see my wonderful sister Temari frowning at me.

Reluctantly I took the packet and absently began flipping though. It was explaining, in great detail, what the amalgamation could to for both companies.

"You feeling alright?" Temari asked as she took her seat at my side and poured me a glass of water then handed it to me. I took a sip then nodded. "Really? You sure you don't want me to call the doctor and have him take a quick look at you?"

I grimaced at the thought.

The doctor she was referring to was a total and complete wack job.

Not to mention the fact that he was a little too touchy feely for comfort.

"I'm fine Temari."

She went silent for a moment before starting back up.

"I don't think you are. You keep spacing out and before, you looked really uncomfortable and slightly pink…do you have the flu? Or cold?"

"Temari I am fine." I snapped, my gaze unwillingly going to Sakura who stared at me with worried eyes.

"You sure you don't want me to do a quick check-up on you?" She whispered, leaning forward on her elbows, effectively giving me a good eyeful of her chest.

"Oh yeah! I forgot Sakura was a doctor." Temari walked over and laid a hand atop Sakura's shoulder. "Would you mind? He doesn't like the company doctor here but I'm sure he's getting sick or something. It'd be great if you would just-"

"No! I'm fine! Stop treating me like some impudent child!" I glared at my sister and tugged at the collar of my shirt.

I couldn't have Sakura doing a check-up on me.

She was Naruto's girlfriend for fucks sake!

I shook my head, trying to get the disturbing thoughts out.

She was gorgeous, but she was my best friends' girl.

That was reason enough not to look at her.

But I couldn't not look at her; she was going to start her side of the presentation soon. My eyes followed her as she inserted her flash drive into the laptop and set up the virtual presentation. I watched as her butt swayed from side to side, my eyes trailing over the outline of her-

"Gaara!" I suddenly felt a punch to my shoulder.

"The fuck?" I yelped as I glared at Kankurou.

"Watch your mouth!" Temari glared now at Sakura's side.

"He fucking p-"

"Gaara!" Temari sent me a death glare.

I sighed and slouched down in my seat. I couldn't win either way.

Beside me Kankurou pulled his chair closer and nudged my elbow. "Gaara-bro what the hell is going on with you today?" He whispered, making a grand show about pouring some water into his glass.

"What the hell are you on about?" I kept my eyes trained onto the stack of papers in front of me, not trusting myself to look up again.

"I saw you man, your eyes were glued to Sakura's ass."

Shit.

He saw.

For fucks sake could my day get any worse?

"Look, I know she's hot-trust me I know-but she's Naruto's girl. Remember him? Your best friend?" He casually slid his glass of water to me and leaned back.

"I know Kankurou I'm not an idiot." I growled.

That shut him up for a few seconds.

_Situations Situations _

Sakura's presentation was torture to sit through.

Absolute.

Physical.

Torture.

I couldn't keep my eyes off of her nor could I keep them on.

Every time she spoke all I heard was the blood rushing in my ears.

To say I was sexually frustrated by the end of the hour was the least.

I had a blistering headache, a goddamn hard-on, and I was sweating like a fucking pig. Needless to say that as soon as the lights went on Temari was fluttering around me like a canary; insisting I go see the doctor, ordering the secretaries to get cold packs and water bottles.

I don't even know how I got of that room but I flew like fucking hell as soon as she turned around and barricaded myself in my private office.

I had ten minutes alone. That was all I got before the pounding and threats started at my door.

"Gaara!" Temari screamed as she knocked repeatedly against the white door. "You alright? Open up!"

"Leave me alone Temari." I answered, surprised at how calm and level my voice sounded as I tried to get rid of my boner at the same time.

I tried everything I could.

Finally the thought of Karin, Sasuke's groupie in a negligee did the trick.

Damn that woman was annoying.

And ugly.

I sighed in relief as the strain in my pants eased.

"Gaara are you sick?" Temari's annoying voice started up again.

She is one persistent woman, I'll give her that.

I remained silent for a moment, absently loosing the tie around my neck and toeing off my shoes. "Yes Temari." I drawled. "I'm sick. Now leave me alone. I sat through your annoying meeting now leave me be." Surprisingly, I heard the click of her heels as she walked away.

Well that was unexpected.

Usually she prattled on and on until she got her way.

I wasn't about to question it though and leaned back in my chair and stretched my legs out in front of me. It was time for a well deserved rest; I decided and rolled up the sleeves of my dress shirt.

_Situations Situations _

Too bad Lady Luck is against me today. As soon as I reclined my neck onto the back of my chair and was about to dose off, a knock sounded at my door. At first I chose to ignore it but the person was a persistent little tick and kept at it for five minutes straight.

"Alright already come in!" I growled and clicked the button on my desk that unlocked the door. "Who the hell are you and why are you bothering me?" I snarled, sitting up in my chair, not looking at them.

"Sorry to disturb you Gaara."

My head snapped up at the sound of Sakura's voice. There she stood near the door, uncomfortable.

"Oh Sakura." I cleared my throat, mentally kicking myself for cursing at her. "Sorry about that…Temari was…well what can I help you with?" I tried to redeem myself.

It was bad enough that every time I looked at her I basically got a hard on, I didn't need her going back and telling Naruto what fuck-up I am in the head.

Then he would ask me what was really going on, and then I'd tell him the truth because I could lie to the poor guy.

Sakura stared at me; a light blush covered her cheeks and spread down her neck. "Well…I-uh…" She cleared her throat and started again. "Temari sent me in to check on you…she was…adamant that I make sure your well…"

I sighed and ran a hand through my already messy hair. "Damn her…I said I was fine."

"Yes well…" Her hand reached up to tug at the hair at the nape of her neck. "I suppose she's really worried about you…you did seem rather…ill…during the meeting…"

Trust her to notice I'm off today.

Well I suppose that is expected, she is a doctor after all.

I beckoned her forward to have a seat in one of the chairs in front of my desk. "Would you like some coffee? Tea?" I offered, rubbing my eyes and leaning forward on my desk.

"No no I'm fine." She cleared her throat. "But really Gaara, are you okay?" I quickly skimmed her; she was uncomfortable with the situation. Most likely she was forced to come check on me by Temari and warned by the idiot Kankurou to keep her distance.

The poor girl must think I'm having a mental breakdown.

I worked my jaw as I laced my fingers and stared past her head. "I'm merely having a bad day today. Temari is the one who blew it all out of proportion. Forgive her-she's dramatic like that."

Emerald eyes locked with my own. "You positive you're okay Gaara?"

Yes. I'm positive Sakura.

I'm just sexually frustrated right now and I got an importune boner because I'm physically attracted to you and didn't get my alone time in the shower this morning because the fucking alarm clock broke.

"Yes Sakura, I'm positive I'm fine."

She looked unsure for a moment but then shrugged it off, smiled, then bid me goodbye.

After she left I locked my office door and threw myself onto my couch face down.

Sometimes being a guy just plain fucking sucked.

_Situations Situations _

L.

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Review with your thoughts.

Continue?

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	4. Deidara & Sasori

L.

Situations

Chapter 4

It's awkward when you have a crush.

It's even more awkward when your crush, turns into an obsession.

It's downright embarrassing when your obsession, turns into unexplainable, unattainable, love.

My name is Deidara.

And I fell in love with the perfect man.

_Situations Situations _

I stifled a yawn as I arched my back and began to work out the kinks that had set in from sleeping all night on the couch. Which was a lot. I glanced around at my surroundings and rubbed the remainder of sleep from my eyes as I slowly got to my feet. I was in my flat, but the place was trashed with art supplies of all kinds. Everything from acrylic paint, to oven fired clay.

I wasn't too sure how my flat got this way, but the way my night went, anything was fucking possible.

A heavy sigh escaped my mouth and I began to make my way into the kitchen only to step on something sharp.

"Holy fuck!" I howled and jumped back, hopping on one leg. "Fuck fuck fuck!" I grasped my now bleeding left foot and glared down at the carving knife lying innocently on the floor.

"What the hell?" My head whipped to the side to see Sasori standing in my bedroom doorway rubbing his eyes. "What the hell is going on Deidara? It's fucking five in the morning."

I scowled and applied pressure to the wound under my foot. "My fucking foot is bleeding." I grumbled and attempted to put my foot down only to yank it back up when a fresh bout of pain began.

"Your foot is bleeding?" He moved from the door to come up beside me. "How-never mind. Sit down I'll get the first aid kit." He muttered and gave me a light shove on the shoulder so I went crashing back down on the couch.

I heaved a heavy sigh and tried to ignore the pain.

Sasori was a friend of a friend who was now crashing at my place while on a trial period at an art studio. I didn't know him too well, only that he was an artist, like me.

We only meant last night.

And then I wanted to smash my head against the wall.

He was like no one I ever met before.

He was calm and collected, yet strong and intense.

He was quiet, yet intelligent.

In short, he was hot.

"Where is your medical kit?" His voice traveled from the bathroom.

"In the cupboard. Where else?"

I watched him out of the corner of my eye as he walked down the hallway with the medical kit in hand; noting for the first time how he was dressed. He wore only plaid pajama bottoms.

Nothing else.

That only made me aware of how I was dressed; a white wife beater and pajama bottoms.

"Found it." He mumbled and sat directly in front of me on the coffee table. It was then my eyes began to roam and I really began to take him in. He was indeed naturally pale, unlike me who was tan, and had an amazing body. I mean it was like he was fucking carved by angels. His arms flexed naturally with every move and his abs. Holy crap his abs.

Now might be a good time to mention that I am gay.

And quite happy with my sexuality.

"Give me your foot." He ordered, though it didn't connect to my brain.

I was still gaping at his abs.

"Deidara." He took my bleeding foot in his hands, successfully pulling me back down to earth. "You alright?"

I scowled to myself but nodded. "Yeah. How does it look?" I winced as he began to dab a peroxide covered cloth over the offending wound. "Not too bad." He answered clinically, not at all bothered.

"Good." I mumbled, tearing my eyes away from him to stare out at the rooftop.

I couldn't be attracted to him.

I wouldn't allow myself to be attracted to him.

He was Konan's friend for fucks sake!

After a few seconds of cleaning to caked on blood from the bottom of my foot, he began to fan the wound to make the skin dry faster. "So…" He began casually, pulling my attention back to him. "How did you…" He gestured to my foot propped up on his leg.

I sighed and sunk down lower in the couch. "Stepped on a knife."

He nodded, his red hand falling into his eyes. "Right…" He cast a glance around the flat. "Best clean up then."

I shrugged, use to the mess.

_Situations Situations _

It was weird having someone else invading my personal sanctuary. I wasn't at all use to it.

I had to be considerate of someone else, which was new to me. I was use to drinking all of the coffee in the peculator, taking long showers and spending hours in the bathroom combing my hair. But suddenly, there was someone else to be concerned about.

So there I stood in front of the bathroom mirror, pulling a comb though my long blonde hair trying to get all of the tangles out. Having long hair was such a fucking pain in the ass, maybe I should cut it?

Suddenly the bathroom door slammed open.

"What the fuck?" I glared at Sasori through the mirror. "No one ever teach you to knock on the fucking door?"

He glared back at me and stalked in, making a beeline for the toilet. "No one ever teach you consideration?" He shot back, pulling down the zipper to his pants.

"You gonna take a piss right now?" I asked, slightly panicking.

"No I'm going to milk a goddamn cow-what the hell do you think?" He spat and pulled out his dick.

That was the moment I chose to leave the bathroom, my hair completely forgotten.

Since then, I always locked the bathroom door and never spent too long in there.

Least he know how to pick the damn lock.

_Situations Situations _

The next morning woke to sounds of someone cursing. Not exactly my ideal way to wake up. Turns out, that I should have just stayed in bed. As soon as I walked into the living room, I almost lost my manly bits to a knife being thrown my way.

Knives just don't seem to like me nowadays.

The blade didn't hit my balls, and I silently thanking whatever God that would listen for sparing me and ventured forth.

Turns out Sasori was working on something.

Something that involved a lot of sharp objects, cursing, and bad luck on my part.

I high tailed it out of there faster than a dog taking a piss.

_Situations Situations _

So I hid out in work that day; which was something I never had to do before. Hide from my own flat? Even it sounded stupid to my ears.

"Deidara sir, is there anything I can get you?" I glanced down at the secretary for the art studio to see her batting her long, fake eyelashes at me. If memory serves, her name was Karin or something to that effect. She was a short, messy red head with glasses and funny colored eyes.

In short, I wanted her to stay the hell away from me.

"No no…Karin…I'm fine." I laughed awkwardly and began to scoot my way upstairs to the working studio.

"Are you sure?" She followed me step for step, her high heels clicking. "I can get you anything you want…" She trailed off seductively, leaning forward to give me an eye full of the tops of her breasts that were basically popping out of her shirt.

It was a wonder that the buttons on her blouse were holding on so long.

Hats off to them.

"No, I'm good Karin. Really I don't need anything."She forced me back onto the first step.

"How about something you want?" She winked at me and licked her lips. "I can give you a-"

"Karin I swear if I need anything at all, I'll come find you." I put my hands up in defense.

"Oh my God!" She grabbed my hands and pulled them towards her. "What happened to you?" She ran her fingers over the scars on the palms of my hands. "They look like…are you okay?"

With a little force I managed to pull my hands out of hers. "Yeah, they are old. It was a sculpting accident. Now id you'll excuse me…" Then I ran up the stairs like hell.

And this is why I choose to work at home.

Essentially, the working studio above the sales floor belonged to me. I was the only artist employed there that was granted access to work there. Everyone else had to work at home and then transport their pieces here.

I was one lucky son of a bitch.

_Situations Situations _

I went back to my flat at about nine that night, praying that Sasori was done with whatever the hell it is he was doing.

I really didn't want to be accidentally impaled by anything sharp.

Or dull for that matter.

Nothing prepared me for the sight that I was met with as soon as the door opened. There stood Sasori in all his glory. Okay, well maybe not all his glory but defiantly some of it. He stood in the middle of the living room, without a shirt, only some old, beat up blue jeans he probably throws on for work, working on his, for lack of a better word masterpiece.

He had built what appeared to be a puppet, but in the image a human.

Which scared me shitless-the damned thing was so lifelike.

Talk about having talent.

"I'm back…" I trailed off, not wanting to be on the receiving end of his wrath.

He glanced over his muscular shoulder and nodded at me. "Welcome home." He whispered to me, much like the way a boyfriend might welcome home his boyfriend from a long day of work.

I breathed deeply, willing away the impending boner I felt coming.

I needed a drink.

A nice, hard, liquor filled drink.

I dodged into the kitchen, poured myself a shot of whiskey and leaned on the counter. Bad move. Bad fucking move.

There he was, staring intently into the eyes of his puppet, painting the irises.

I gulped down my drink; not even tasting the alcohol then made a beeline for my bedroom and tossed myself onto my bed. There was no denying it.

I had a crush on Sasori.

With that last, remaining tortures thought sleep pulled me down into her waiting arms.

_Situations Situations _

Within two weeks, my crush turned into a full out obsession.

Unconsciously I found myself making an extra cup of coffee for him in the mornings, putting away my art supplies as to not upset him, leaving hot water in the pipes so he can take a shower right after me, and calling him when I was going to be five minutes late home.

I knew exactly how he liked his eggs and precisely how much sugar to put into his coffee.

I knew that he favored grapes to bananas and only ate dessert on Fridays.

And I also knew that I was obsessing over him in a very stalkerish way.

I groaned loudly and threw the brush I was using to paint with on the floor and stalked away from the half painted canvas. I could no longer concentrate knowing that Sasori was in my shower right now.

Naked.

With water flowing over that sexy body.

And soap lathering all-

"Fuck!"

I gritted my teeth, grabbed my jacket and ran out of my flat.

_Situations Situations _

So where did I run to?

The only place that I knew off the top of my head obviously.

Fucking Ino Yamanaka's place.

I knocked on her door, practically jogging in place waiting for her to open up. After a few seconds I knocked again. "Ino!" I growled as soon as she yanked the door open while simultaneously buttoning her shorts.

"Deidara?" She blinked then opened the door for me to enter. "What brings you here?" She asked, closing the door behind me and following me into the living room.

"Stuff…" I threw myself absently on her loveseat and let out a long, suffocating sigh.

"Alrightt…" She sank into the chair opposite me and fixed her purple blouse. She allowed me a few minutes to calm down before she began mothering me. "Would you like to talk about it?" She asked sweetly, standing up and walking to her kitchen to make our ritual pot of tea.

Any time I show up at her place, anxious, tongue tied and distant she always gave me about five minutes to clam the fuck down, made a pot of tea, pulled out some cookies and shut off the phone.

It was our time.

It was when she devoted herself solely to me and whatever the hell it was that freaked me out.

Which I was entirely grateful for.

No matter how weird it seemed, she was the only one who I could really relate to.

"Here we go." She sang as she placed a tray filled with a hot kettle, two cups and a plate of cookies on the coffee table. She then proceeded to pour tea into the two cups, sweeten them both before handing me mine. "So…talk to me hun. What's eating you?"

The question hung in the air.

There was no way I could answer her.

How do I say that I'm attracted to my flat mate?

Ino ran her fingers though the ends of her hair and smiled knowingly at me. "Alright, I'll talk." She took a deep breath. "So I went to the village yesterday-you know the ones with all the cute little shops in it? Anyways while I was on my way to the sunglasses shop-the one with the little girl who's always there-I ran into the biggest dog I've ever seen! He was black with long shaggy fur and just the sweetest thing ever! So of course I stopped and smiled; I wouldn't touch him though-you know how much…"

I chewed the inside of my cheek and stared past Ino's head as she continued to talk, blathering on and on about something. I honestly wasn't listening to one word she was saying.

It went on like that for about thirty more seconds before she stopped talking and began to stare at me.

And I do mean stare.

She just sat there, sipping her tea, staring at me. One leg crossed over the over, her long blonde hair in a pony tail tossed over one shoulder, exposing the side of her neck, and her blue eyes just following me.

I let her do that all of fifty five seconds before I snapped.

"Ino why the hell are you staring at me for?" My lip curled as she smiled.

"You." She sipped her tea. "Weren't listening to me."

My eyes rolled and I crossed one leg over the other. "When do I ever listen to you?"

"Stop biting my head off and tell me what's bothering you."

A frown tugged at my mouth before I sighed, completely defeated. "I…am obsessed."

She let the silence hang in the air for a few minutes before nodding. "With?"

"A person."

"Who is?"

"Not…" I trailed off.

"Gay?" She finished.

This was why I put up with Ino and her unconventional, pushy ways. She always got where I was coming from; no matter how vague.

A small smile crawled its way onto her lips as she shifted in her chair and leaned forward a bit. "Is he hot?" She asked coyly.

I tried desperately to keep the grin off of my face. But failed. "Of course he is."

She tapped a long, manicured nail against her chin. "Is he…" Her eyes narrowed as she stared at me, thinking. "He appreciates art?"

"Naturally."

"Oh tell me why don't you?"

I sighed. "It's…Sasori."

She clucked her tongue. "The guy that's crashing at your place?"

"Of course. Cause life hates me…as well as knives."

Her eyebrows creased but she continued on, ignoring the knife bit clearly not wanting to know. "Are you sure he's straight?"

"What do you mean? Of course he's fucking straight!"

"Oh calm down I only meant if you flat out asked him if he was gay or not. I mean-"

"I am not asking him if he's fucking straight Ino." My eyes automatically sized her up.

"I'm just saying just because you like him doesn't automatically mean he is straight. You can get dates you know." She rolled her eyes but smiled. "Just be open to the damn possibilities will you?"

_Situations Situations _

I went home after about four hours of relaxing at Ino's, and everything was perfectly fine; that is until the front door stood before me and my heart rate rapidly increased. So after standing in front of the offending thing for a whole three minutes, debating whether or not I should run, I opened it.

Then immediately regretted it.

There he stood in the middle of the kitchen making some coffee looking incredibly sexy. Don't ask me why, he just did.

"Hey, welcome back." He nodded at me then beckoned me inside. "Don't just stand there, come on. Do you want some coffee?"

Stiffly I moved inside, kicking the door closed behind me and moved to the other side of the counter that divided the kitchen and living room.

"So…" I glanced at him standing opposite me.

"You're…into guys huh?"

Awkward silence.

I felt my face heat up as I tore my gaze away from him and stared out at the rooftop behind him.

How did he know?

Is he just fucking with me?

Oh shit.

Oh shit oh shit oh shit.

Do I come out?

Should I?

Would that make him feel uncomfortable?

He can't be gay.

He just can't be.

"Look…Deidara…its-"

"How'd you find out?" I cut him off, sipping at my hot cup of coffee and staring down at the counter top, trying to play it cool. Though on the inside my heart was in my throat and my stomach was at my feet.

He sighed and shifted. "I uh…found you're…magazines."

Shit.

The magazines!

The fucking magazines!

My gay porn!

Inwardly I groaned.

I knew there was something I forgot to do.

Hide my fucking gay stash.

Wait a minute.

My head whipped up to meet his eyes. "You went searching though my fucking closet!"

His intense eyes bore into my own. "Is that what you choose to focus on at the moment?"

"Yes! Because you just outed me to yourself!"

He looked at me funny then chuckled. "Okay…how about I make it up to you for invading your privacy and outing….you to me?"

I worked my jaw, not at all buying anything he was selling.

His eyes flicked down from my face to my chest then back up.

Slowly, he leaned over the counter, and my heart just about stopped. "I" He whispered, his face directly in front of mine. "Am…" His hand gently rested on my shoulder. "…Interested…" His lips just barely brushed mine before he pulled back, eyes trained on my face while my brain shut down.

Holy. Crap.

He is interested.

Interested.

In me?

"Deidara?" At the sound of his voice, I snapped out of it.

"Yeah?" My eyes locked with his.

"Would you like to go out to dinner tonight?"

I swallowed thickly and licked my lips.

This is so fucking unbelievable.

"Y-yeah…yes…." I nodded, trying to suppress the urge to start dancing.

I couldn't believe my fucking luck!

I got the guy!

Who would have thought that he was interested in me?

I fell in love with a man I know I shouldn't have.

I mean, he was straight.

Or at least I thought he was.

But sometimes, you just can't control what your heart wants.

_Situations Situations _

L.

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	5. Kiba & Hinata

L.

A bit short.

Situations

Chapter 5

It's embarrassing taking a shit in a public restroom.

It's even more uncomfortable going when you know your friend's are near.

But it's a whole different situation when you're taking a shit in your own home and someone walks in on you.

My name is Kiba Inuzuka.

And my good friend walked in on me while I was taking a crap.

_Situations Situations _

It's a normal occurrence.

Everybody does it.

Every single person takes a shit.

It may vary; some people go in the morning, some at night. Some every day others every few.

Point is; everyone has to crap.

So there I was, happily minding my own business playing Mario Carts on my nice, shiny new flat screen television that I just mounted to the wall yesterday. Life was good.

Well, it was good until Naruto came bargaining into my house without knocking.

"KIBA! My man what's going on?" He grinned and stood in front of me, successfully blocking my view of the television screen.

I scowled, paused the game and glared at him. "What the fucking hell do you want?" I was not in the mood to entertain Naruto.

It took too much energy.

And to be honest, I just wanted to play Mario Cart.

"Dude language." He wagged his finger at me and laughed, completely oblivious to my foul mood. "Hinata's here!"

I glanced over my shoulder to see Hinata standing in the middle of the kitchen wearing a white apron over a purple dress. "Hi Hinata."

"Hi Kiba." She gave me a little wave.

"Yes! We are here to make you lunch and a cake!" Naruto grabbed my shoulders and shook me. I don't know why he did but he did. "HAPPY UNBIRTHDAY MAN!" He screamed in my face, spitting on me.

I blinked.

And blinked.

Then glanced at my television to see Luigi in ninth place.

"Uh…what?"

"Unbirthday! It's everyone's Unbirthday!"

I raised an eyebrow at him and wiped his saliva off of my face. Sometimes I just didn't get Naruto. Sure he was my best friend and all but sometimes he just went off into his own fucking world where I didn't even understand him. "Unbirthday? What the hell is that?"

He grinned then threw himself onto the couch beside me, successfully ending any hope I had of going back and playing Mario Cart.

"It's from Alice in Wonderland." He stated simply, making himself comfortable.

"Wonderland?"

"Yeah. Sakura and I watched the movie last night." He grinned at me. "It was one weird ass movie. But there's this part where they sing 'Happy Unbirthday' and she explained what it meant and well-" He shrugged. "Thought we'd come over here and celebrate."

That fucking smartass! This was all a fucking pretense to come over here and party!

Damnit.

I should give him more credit.

He's smarter than I think.

"Sakura had to work." He began counting off on his fingers. "Ino's doing a photo shoot, Shikamaru is working but Hinata is here!" He grinned at Hinata over his shoulder. "I was going to ask everyone else but figured that since its Wednesday, they're all probably working."

I groaned and stood up. Might as well get some beer. "And why aren't you? Today's my day off and Hinata works evenings but what the hell is your excuse?" I walked into the kitchen just as Hinata held out two beers and an opener. "Thanks." I smiled at her.

I always did like Hinata.

So helpful and nice.

I walked back to the couch and handed Naruto a beer.

"Ehhh didn't feel like going in today." He shrugged nonchalantly.

I opened my beer and handed him the opener. "You're a fucking video game tester-how do you get bored of that?" I took a swig of my beer.

"I don't know…just don't feel like it today."

_Situations Situations _

So Naruto and I spent the next hour talking, drinking and playing Mario Cart while Hinata cooked something I never even heard of; but it smelled pretty damn good.

"Okay, food's done." Hinata stated over the clink of glasses. "I placed everything on the table so all you have to do is fill your plate."

We paused the game and walked over to the tiny dining area where she set up the food. The small table was covered with dishes overflowing with what looked like vegetables, three different types of meat, rice, and what I suspected to be potato.

But I wasn't too sure.

Immediately Naruto sat down and dug in, shoving the food into his mouth without even chewing.

Hinata ignored him and took a seat as well, leaving me to sit at the head of the table.

"I made tea." She stated and poured each of us a cup. "To enjoy this meal you mustn't drink it with alcohol okay?"

Uneasily, I grabbed the dish in front of me and inspected it. It looked to be beef cooked in some sort of brown sauce with peppers chipped up in it.

I took a spoonful.

Next she handed me the bowl full of vegetables. I grabbed the thongs and tossed the salad a bit, eyeing the cucumbers, peppers, vegetables and lettuce.

"So what is all of this Hinata?" I accepted the dish of fried chicken she handed me and took two pieces; I sort of doubted she could mess up fried chicken.

See, Hinata wasn't the best of cooks.

She had the innate ability to somehow mess up even the simplest of foods.

Not that I really had any room to talk about cooking skills but she tended to unintentionally poison the food she's making.

I glanced at Naruto to see him eating the fried chicken without any trouble.

I didn't know whether to take that as a good sign or not; he's been eating Hinata's food since he was a kid, for all I knew he could have built up immunity to her cooking.

But I tossed all of that out of the window and dug in, it did smell really good.

What's the worst that can happen?

_Situations Situations _

My stomach was hurting.

Like really, truly, fucking hurting. You know, like when you ate something bad and you can feel it trying to claw its way out of your gut.

Yeah.

That bad.

I jumped out of the chair, starting Naruto and Hinata and ran into the bathroom shut the door and dropped my pants.

I had to shit so fucking bad.

With relief, I sat on the toilet and finally let myself go.

It stank.

I mean really it really smelled bad.

Like a mixture of stale milk and beans.

Did I even eat beans?

I don't think so.

But I did eat that mystery thing Hinata cooked.

What was it again?

What did she say it was?

Did she even tell me?

"Kiba? Are you okay?" She knocked gently on the door after what felt like an eternity of me sitting on the toilet crapping.

Do I answer?

Can I answer?

Did I lock the door?

I groaned aloud and stared down at my feet, cursing.

"Kiba?" Her voice rose in panic and all the blood in my body rushed to my face.

I was in the middle of taking the mother of all crap.

"Kiba, should I call a doctor? Are you okay? Are you alive?" She began pounding on the door.

But I couldn't even remember how to form words let alone form a cognitive sentence to keep her out.

She began rattling with the door knob.

And before I could yell, she opened the door.

"OH MY-SORRY!"

…

…

…

Hinata just walked in on me.

Hinata just walked in on me while I'm taking a shit.

Fucking hell!

"SORRY!" She slammed the door shut and I heard her run down the hall.

I couldn't crap anymore.

My bowels just locked up in shock and stopped working.

Slowly, I cleaned up and buttoned my pants, washed my hands and opened the bathroom window. It really did smell bad.

Nervously, I opened the bathroom door and trudged down the hallway. In the living room, I found Hinata quickly pulling on her shoes and jacket at the same time. When she saw me, she blushed, gasped and nearly fell over. "I am so terribly sorry Kiba!" She mumbled.

I shuffled my feet, my face burning red and avoided looking at her. "It's uh…its…okay…"

Was it really okay?

I have no fucking idea.

But I will say it was and still is damn embarrassing.

"Where's Naruto?" I tried changing the subject.

Hinata finished putting on her shoes and stood up straight, the jacket hanging half off her shoulder. "He uhm…ran out to buy…soda…" Her pale eyes looked anywhere but me. "I'm going to erm…go now." She made a beeline for the door.

I only nodded and swallowed thickly.

Hinata saw me on the toilet.

She walked in on me while I was taking a shit.

Holy. Fuck.

_Situations Situations _

"Hey man!" Naruto burst through the front door. "I bought-what the hell happened here?" He immediately picked up on the different atmosphere.

I scratched the back of my head and stared down at the WII game system winking at me.

"Kiba w-"

"Hinata walked in on me taking a shit."

Awkward silence.

"Oh." He eventually stated and began unbuttoning his jacket. "Did she see your dick?"

I paled at the realization then promptly passed out.

_Situations Situations _

L.

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